Haiku – Caffeine at 4 P.M.

Afternoon coffee

Filling up the tired system

With an extra boost

Categories: Coffee - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Haiku – Leafy Needs

A wisp of cold wind

Dances through the naked limbs

Tree seems to shiver

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Hemingway Wednesday: Famous Words from Papa (3/22/2017)

“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”

Source: Ernest Hemingway Quotes – BrainyQuote

Categories: Wednesday Quotes | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Tuesdays with Mike and The Mike Beem Chronicles (3/21/2017): A Zombie Christmas 2

Another Tuesday. Another day to catch up with Mike and The Mike Beem Chronicles. Enjoy.

One Writer Ranting

A boy lost. A family desperate. It’s Christmas in a Zombie Apocalypse and Mike Beem is once again aiming for another Holiday miracle. His goal this year isn’t toys for the kids in the neighborhood. His goal this time is trying to save one small life so another family doesn’t have to suffer the way he suffered.

US: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MF4WHII

UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01MF4WHII

AU: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B01MF4WHII

CA: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B01MF4WHII

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Mike Beem lowered his rifle, put his right eye on the scope, and closed his left. The zombie he was about to shoot was an ugly sucker. He stood about five feet tall, and was currently surrounded by 10 other zombies – all of them dead, rotten, and ugly. They were currently trying to kill a frantic man standing on top of a closed dumpster. He was waving a dying flare at them, firing an empty pistol over and over again in hopes that…

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Haiku – Fuel for Flight

Bird searching for food

Pecking at the cold spring ground

Hoping for a worm

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For more prompts like “search” go here: Haiku Horizons

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Free Read Sunday (3/19/2017): A Zombie Christmas 1 and 2, and A Vampire at Christmas

Another new post for my latest blog.

One Writer Ranting

A short story about a Vampire who uses his riches and immortal skills to bring joy to those in need during the Christmas Season.

5 out of 5 stars: A deadly and dashing vampire

5 out of 5 stars: A great read

US: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00KRCCTU0?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00KRCCTU0?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

AU: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B00KRCCTU0?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

CA: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00KRCCTU0?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

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A threebie’s (look at me making up words) of freebies.

And a little Christmas cheer to boot.

You can find A Zombie Christmas 1 and 2 by clicking the links above.

Enjoy.

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EXP: A VAMPIRE AT CHRISTMAS

Talan Gawayn became a vampire in the 15th century on a cold, starry, full-moon night just after the first big snow of November. He was walking a less traveled path, on his way home from seeing his fiancé, whom he planned to marry the following spring, when three men stepped out of the shadows to rob him. He fought them…

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New Short Story: Gluten Free

Suicide by Gluten? In this short story one man opts out in a most unusual way.

US: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XPTFHLM

UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B06XPTFHLM

AU: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B06XPTFHLM

CA: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B06XPTFHLM

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If you look above, that is another new short story available on Amazon. It is a short one, but I liked the cover so I decided to publish it.

I also have a few other new things to mention to you as well. My new blog is cruising along.

You can find it here – themikebeemchronicles.wordpress.com

I also have spread a few of my writings around the web.

You can now find Killer Treads and AWOL at these locations – Noise Trade and Draft2Digital.

That’s it. Have a great Sunday.

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The Opening to Gluten Free

My name is Alan Category and by the time you read this I will be dead.  Yes, that’s not a typo.  My last name is Category.  I was born with it, mocked with it, lived with it, made love with it, got married three times with it, divorced twice with it, and folks, those reading this, I will die with it.  That name will be engraved on my tombstone right above my head where I will be lying six feet under the dirt, waiting on the worms to come and finish me off.  You see, I am Gluten Free and I am supposed to stay Gluten Free for the rest of my life. I have a rare condition, maybe four people in the entire world have it. Gluten is not just an allergy for me, but a killer. A bona-fide suck your soul out of your body and send it to heaven or hell killer. I have to worry about not only eating it, but getting it anywhere near my body.  I can’t even inhale it.  It is just that lethal for me.  And you know what?  I’m tired of thinking about it, tired of restricting my fucking diet, tired of fucking paying for it, just plain tired of trying live in a world that isn’t Gluten fucking Free.  I’m also tired of worrying about my weight, tired of exercise, tired of just doing it all for that fucking bitch who ripped out my heart and shat all over it. You see, I love pizza and I haven’t had it for so very long.  Sure, I’ve had the Gluten Free stuff, some of it isn’t bad, but that shit ain’t pizza.  That melt in your mouth traditional kind of pizza that makes your knees buckle. Almost gives you an orgasm kind of pizza. It just isn’t and won’t ever be no matter how they try to make it seem that way. Anyway, off on a rant there for a minute.  Where was I?  Damn my hand is cramping up. Fucking arthritis. Sucks to get old, but shit I don’t have to be getting older very much longer. (I chuckled here in case one of my bitch ex-wives reads this, yes bitch, I went out laughing). Anyway, once again, you see pizza is the most lethal thing I can eat.  I was told that by my doctor. Cunt! She said pizza would kill me instantly, and I have avoided it till tonight.  Till this very night. But now, I’ve decided it is the best way to go out even if it is a fucking rip off. 20 damn bucks for extra cheese, thick crust, and meat – total bullshit! So my suicide will be self-inflicted, but it won’t be the way most people opt out, cash in the check so to speak – gun in mouth, brains splattered across the wall, hanging from a self-made noose, leaping off a tall building, you know the drill. My suicide will be a little more painful.  Wait, what’s that?  I hear a car pulling up outside, footsteps on the gravel parking lot, footsteps on the concrete stoop in front of my door, a knock, my death rattle.  Okay, folks, let me answer that door.

Categories: One Writer Ranting | Tags: , , , , | 1 Comment

Haiku – 3/18/2017

Wet, grey, bleak, dreary

Rain showers falling outside

Covering the ground

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Haiku – Trash Invasion

Discarded apple

Laying in broken pieces

Scattered in the night

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I had a big ol’ Possum come calling last night. I kept hearing something as I was reading on the couch, and I went to check the deck and there it was nosing in the trash bag I left out there. I guess it got hungry.

So, what’s the strangest thing you’ve seen around your house?

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , | 3 Comments

Jimmy Buffett Friday: Floridays

Categories: JB FRIDAY | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Your Weekly Horror Feeding (3/16/2017) – Paranormal Lockdown

New post for my new blog.

One Writer Ranting

Have you guys (the one or two who may read this post) seen this show? I started checking it out because Nick Groff was starring in it. Yes, that Nick Groff from Ghost Adventures. I am glad I found it. Really entertaining to watch. So, (you one or two reading this) have you seen it? Real or fake? 

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Haiku – 3/16/2017

A loud bird chirping

Sending out the song of spring

On a cold morning

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Haiku – 3/15/2017

A cold still morning

Caffeine pulls me from slumber

Coffee warms me up

Categories: Coffee - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Hemingway Wednesday: Famous Words from Papa (3/15/2017)

“The world is a fine place and worth the fighting for and I hate very much to leave it.”

Source: Ernest Hemingway Quotes – BrainyQuote

Categories: Wednesday Quotes | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Tuesdays with Mike and The Mike Beem Chronicles (3/14/2017): A Zombie Christmas

A New Blog Post – Time for some Christmas cheer with Zombies.

One Writer Ranting

This short story is about three men who risk life and limb in a Zombie Apocalypse in order to bring happiness to surviving kids on Christmas Morning.

5 out of 5 stars – An Uplifting Tale of Christmas Generosity, in a Time When Helping Others is a Real Challenge.

5 out of 5 stars – I love zombies and I love Christmas ~ A winner!

5 out of 5 stars – A Cute Little Holiday Horror Story.

5 out of 5 stars – In a zombie world, there is a Christmas miracle.

US: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004GUS7WS?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B004GUS7WS?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

AU: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B004GUS7WS?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

CA: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B004GUS7WS?*Version*=1&*entries*=0

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The one that started The Mike Beem Chronicles.

And a crowd favorite.

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Mike Beem lowered his rifle, put his right eye on the scope, and closed his left eye. The zombie he was about to shoot was an ugly sucker. From what Mike could tell, this zombie used…

View original post 475 more words

Categories: Random - Poems and Haiku | Leave a comment

Haiku – 3/14/2017

Rain on the window

Pushing hard against the glass

Thick, wet, angry drops

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Haiku – 3/13/2017

Robins are confused

Trying to keep themselves warm

On a cold morning

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Haiku – Heart of the House 2

Turning on the light

Looking all around the room

Something watching me

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For more prompts like “light” go here: Haiku Horizons

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Heart of the House 

Floorboards creak at night

Phantom footsteps in the room

Cold spots lingering

Categories: Horror - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , , , | 3 Comments

Free Read Sunday (3/12/2017): Flesh for the Zombies

New post for my new blog!

One Writer Ranting

A zombie shuffled down the street underneath a gigantic yellow full moon. He was dressed in an apron, a former fry cook still carrying a spatula in his hand. He shambled along down the road, solo, unaware of the cool night air or the peaceful sound of crickets ushering autumn into the world. A silent bullet suddenly and violently took the top part of his head off, sending the undead creature tumbling and bleeding to the ground. He rested there, unmoving, spatula still gripped tight in his hand.

“How are things up there?”

Mike hit the button on his Walkie Talkie. “All good, Fred. You?”

“Nothing on this side. How does the gate look?”

“Holding tight,” Mike replied, as he looked down from the platform of Guard Tower 1 to the makeshift gate they had made earlier that day. The gate now consisted of his SUV and truck along with…

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Haiku – 3/12/2017 Part 2

Snow is now falling

Heavy thick white frozen flakes

Covering the ground

Categories: Nature - Poems and Haiku | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

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